The Return of Woody Chewshoes *this is a dog post*

When Rocco was a puppy, he chewed EVERYTHING. Shoes (I lost count), bras (ALL of them), baseboard, night table; he accidenally shut himself in the bathroom, knocked the garbage can over and ate all of the Q-tips. He had toys, LOADS of toys, and he chewed those too. So when Royston came along, it seemed like we had lucked out, and when he was really small, we were lucky. But in the last two weeks... well... something has changed. He's eaten 2 remotes, a door jamb, a pillow, a bag clip...

Yesterday, I was gone ten minutes. TEN MINUTES! And I came home to this:

Is that not the most pitiful thing you've ever seen? The "I know I shouldn't have but I. Just. Couldn't. Help it!" look. Note the chew toy that's right there.

Eastlink has a chat option, handy since there's nowhere on the website to get addresses for the stores/kiosks.

Please wait while we find an agent to assist you...

You have been connected to Richard.

Richard: Thank you for contacting EastLink, my
name is Richard, and I will be assisting you today, how may I help
you?

Trudy Munroe: Hi Richard. My dog ate my remote, and I need a new
one. Where can I get one?

Richard: You can get one from one of our
Kiosks if you live near one, or speak to customer service if you would need to
get one mailed out to you.

Trudy Munroe: I'm in Bedford, where would the closest kisosk be? It's a
bit of an emergency, I'm stuck on a channel that's airing a Van Damme
movie

Richard: Van Damme isn't so bad! Closest one is likely in Halifax
or Dartmouth.

Richard: We have a kiosk in the Halifax shopping center
and Mic Mac mall.

Trudy Munroe: None in Bedford or
sackville?

Trudy Munroe: Please hurry. He's wearing a bandana and
punching a stick.

Richard: We do have one in lower sackville

Richard: The street address is 367 sackville Dr

Trudy Munroe: Thank you! Have a good afternoon :D

Richard: You too!

Richard: Thank you for dropping by Trudy, and have a great
day!

I went to pick it up and the lady suggested I put velcro on it and stick it to the ceiling. I suspect she has dogs as well..

Episode #63 of things that annoy me

1. Commercials/tv shows where the women are gorgeous and their spouse. Just. Really. Isn't.

2. That slimband commercial. Still And Ally as well. They should have to state in the commercial "If you take this pill, you have to eat healthy, like you should, if you want to lose weight. If you don't, all that grease will run out your bottom." Cause I don't care if you're skinny, if you're crapping your pants, you definitely aren't sexy.

3. My complete lack of ambition.

4. Rocco's constant game of "Let me in so I can come back out!"

5. The fact that I can no longer do yoga. Through no fault of my own. Srsly. I bring out the yoga mat, and, well... see photos... comfy yoga mat.

6. All the people on Property Brothers, Love It or List It, Leave it to Bryan, etc. Did you ever have an imagination? Ever? What do you mean, "I just can't see beyond the clutter/wallpaper/popcorn ceiling." Dear God. Live in a tent, you losers.

7. No one has cleaned my sewing room yet. Really, why is it so hard to get good help?

8. I'm unemployed. Yet again. Through no fault of my own. And I am very. Very. Angry.

And the #1 thing that is not annoying me this week: The weather. It's 25+ today, and it's been very, very nice for the last 2 days. I know it's a tease, but I'll take it.

Spring? Spring? Has anyone seen Spring? Anyone? Anyone?

I'll admit it: my sewing room is still a mess, which I really, really, need to clean up. The need for a couch cover was *ahem* underlined for me on Friday when we went for supper and Royston helped himself to my Martha Stewart crimson felt tip pen on the pool blue microfibre couch. *deep breath* Thanks to OxyClean and my little bissell carpet cleaner, the couch is blue again. And yes, the dog still lives here. In fact, they've been really good, his training is coming along nicely....

I think the Christmas cactus is confused. I blame the snow.

And if the Avocado keeps growing like this, it'll need a name. And a place at the table (ha! Table! But more on that later).

Adam brought home some lucky bamboo, and I'm starting to think we're being taken over by odd house plants...

And that reminds me, I never did show the after of the dresser I refinished, so here it is:

One of the local radio stations, Live 105, is having an Ugly Kitchen contest.

Think I can win? It's too bad that you can't see the countertop in all it's glory, or because the kitchen is so small, I can't get a shot of the shitty job they did installing the door and show off the nice tiny sink by the 50 yr old stove. OR the fact that there's nowhere for a GD table! Or the bare lightbulb! And the stove, btw, is an asshole! Every time I put something in that drawer, it won't slide back in, one side hangs down like Paris Hilton's eyelid, but would it do it today? Noooo.

But I shouldn't complain, cause it does work (pleasedon'tjinxitpleasedon'tjinxit). Sunday I made some banana muffins, which were soooo good, and a grapefruit poundcake, which everyone should try. And invite me to your house, cause I'd like some more, please. On the menu tonight: apple butternut soup. Wish me luck! Maybe in a couple months I could be baking in a whole new kitchen! ;D

PS: I apologize for the state of this entry. I don't know what's up with the odd spacing, and thanks if you made it this far! It looks terrible, and I've tried a few times to fix it, so screw it, it is what it is. Think of it as a few moments to think about what you've just read before you get to the next part ;).