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Tuesday, January 25, 2011

WARNING!! This post contains *ahem* vaginal odour

Now, you may be wondering where the hell this came from. Well, first, let me say

if you are noticing a foul odour coming from your crotchal region, get to the doctor, cause it's not supposed to stink.

That being said, there is a Vagisil commercial that seems to be on 800x a day (that I can't find on the internet, and yes, it might be because I've been watching too much TV, but that's neither here nor there) where the the woman facing the camera says, "I found out the hard way that not all cleansers eliminate vaginal odour," while the two women behind her are whispering and glaring at her. Thankfully, she discovered Vagisil before it was too late, and the commercial ends with the three woman chatting amicably, walking along on a bright sunny, day.
Good thing she discovered Vagisil; poor dear, this is probably the first time she could walk around in the daylight without being pecked to death by seagulls.

Why, society? Why is it okay to shame women?

Or how about, they be honest about it? Send out a man in a suit, or even better a lab coat.
Have him say something like, "Ladies, your vaginae are filthy and disgusting. They smell. They do things we don't like and can't talk about. Use our product to hose out your business, or don't blame us when you're shunned, and die alone."
Isn't that really what they're getting at at? And I don't know about you, but I definitely have never seen a commercial with a young man who's afraid his balls stink, and no one will like him. Or maybe they could save time and just dub over this Febreeze ad. Really, try it on mute with this script:

Timmy: Dad, what's that smell??
Dad: Oh. That's your mother's vagina. If your friends come over, tell them we were just at the all you can eat seafood buffet.

Vagisil. Save your family the embarrassment

OHDEARGOD. Yes, it gets me riled. But before I'm done, (and I'm almost done, I promise) I'll just leave you with this gem: If you have some extra time, google vintage Lysol ads. Did you all know it was originally sold to combat vaginal offence? Clearly, we haven't progressed at all. If anything, we're going backwards here; it's not like you can scrub your floor with Vagisil.

6 comments:

  1. Trudy, this is the best and funniest summation of the problem I've read in ages. Can we also talk about how I'm supposed to "Have a happy period!" (Oh, fuck off!) And then there was my personal favorite, which, thank heavens, didn't take off for Always - plus sized maxi pads. As though, if I'm overweight, it also means I have a giant vaginal opening, incapable of being adequately covered by regular sized pads. Also, being fat apparently makes me bleed more. I'm so annoyed at all this garbage being directed at women and our parts. I for one will not be surgically altering mine, nor douching with Lysol whilst I diet and have a happy period.

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  2. Hahaha. Yes. Happy Period. Clearly the advertising brainfart of a man. Oy.

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  3. Just as an aside, tried the Vagisil on my kitchen floor. I wouldn't recommend it.

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  4. Bazinga. I'll remember that. So... what's the outcome?

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  5. I was telling momma about this post; she laughed, of course. Then, the next day said I had to tell you about something she'd heard on Dr. Oz - and I quote: "It's a self-cleaning oven". :)

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  6. HA! Exactly. This is why I miss your mom! xo (And you as well, of course!)

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